Pursuing Happiness - Day 30

"Happiness recedes from those who pursue her."
 Phillip Yancey

When I was much younger and not very wise, I thought I had the right to happiness. I had somehow developed a bit of my own theology wherein, if I did my very best then surely the Lord would see to it that my life would be one titled "Happily Ever After."

It didn't take long before I realized there was a bit of hole somewhere in my theological reasoning, but I couldn't figure it out. Why would God allow all these troubles to come to me when I was trying my best to obey all the rules?

I began to feel a bit out of sorts with God for not keeping up His end of the agreement I had drawn up. So I decided to find happiness on my own. I looked in all the places other people seemed to be finding it. My troubles didn't vanish into a cloud of euphoria, but I felt happier.....for a while.

Somehow this brand of happiness seemed to be rather superficial. It didn't satisfy. I found I had to work harder and harder at it for there to be any measure of satisfaction. Where was this elusive happiness my soul craved?

In the midst of my frantic searching someone whispered, "God is far more interested in making you more like Jesus than He is in your happiness."

I could hardly take it in. Really? Would He allow me to be miserable? It sounded painfully like truth. So I bent my knees. I asked Him to do the work in me He wanted to do. Not without a bit of fear and trembling and not without a secret little hope that He would relent and just make me happy.

It turns out He really is more concerned about molding and shaping me into the image of Jesus than giving me everything my little heart desires. I have seen Him do miraculous things, and I have seen Him allow difficult circumstances that shake me to the foundation of my soul, but always, always He has been there.

I have discovered that joy is much more substantial than happiness. It under-girds suffering and shines through tears of  sorrow. It is His gift, wrapped in a love which does what is best in spite of the pitiful cries for happiness.

Blessings,
Linda

Through the Valley - Day 29

Tears coursed down her cheeks as she told me the story. Many years had passed, but the memory was as fresh as today. Her Mother had fought valiantly against the cancer that consumed her body, but it was clear the battle was nearly over. She lay on a hospital bed in the living room - a dearly loved daughter and husband constantly by her bedside.

I had known the family nearly all my life. This daughter, my sister-in-law, several years younger than I had become like a sister to me. We talked easily about the things stored deep within our hearts. We've been through a lot together. So I felt I could ask the question - one I'd pondered off and on for a long time.

"Was she afraid?"

It seemed a foolish question. Her Mother was a strong Christian. She had served on all of the same boards as my own Mother; they had been good friends. Her faith was without question. Still I wondered. How is it for a child of God knowing they will soon be going home?

Her answer surprised me. "Yes," she said, "she was."

In fact, she became so troubled they called their Pastor and asked him to come and visit. This sweet, Godly woman tearfully told him of her fear - the fear of going into the unknown - alone.

He listened. He didn't admonish her for being fearful, instead he tenderly assured her she would never be alone. He read from the 23th Psalm:

"Even when the way goes through
    Death Valley,
I’m not afraid
    when you walk at my side.
Your trusty shepherd’s crook
    makes me feel secure."
(The Msg.)

Our journey will one day take each of us through the valley of the shadow of death, but we will not walk alone. He has promised to never leave us or forsake us - not for one single second. Those words falling on the ears of a dying woman brought her peace. Just a gentle reminder that we are always in His presence. We have nothing to fear.

Our Father understands the things that make us tremble. We know heaven is perfect and wonderful in every way. It is the going - the way we must travel - that can cause us to be afraid. So He promises we won't have to travel alone. He will walk beside us and bring us safely home. 

Blessings,
Linda

Seek Him - Days 27 & 28

"Let the first act on waking be to place yourself, you heart, mind, faculties, your whole being, in God's hands. Ask Him to take entire possession of you, to be the Guide of your soul, your Life, your Wisdom, your Strength. He wills that we seek Him in all our needs, that we may both know Him truly, and draw closer and closer to Him and in prayer we gain an invisible force which will triumph over seemingly hopeless difficulties."
Henrietta Sidney Lear (1824-1896)

Joining dear friends Sandy and Deidra:





Blessings,
Linda

Immanuel - Day 26

One of the names given to Jesus is Immanuel. It means God with us. When He walked this earth He told His disciples that if they had seen Him they had seen the Father. There He was, quite literally, God walking, talking, sleeping, eating, doing miracles with us.

There are days I long for His physical presence. I imagine sitting at His feet, resting my head against His knee and feeling His hand caress my head. Most days, that would be enough. But there are other days I long to hear His voice. I want to lie still, tucked beneath my quilt, and hear Him tell me the things He has on His heart. After all, I talk all the time, and He listens - oh how He listens.

The reality is, both of those things happen all the time. I may not see Him with my physical eyes or feel His touch, but He is here with me. I may not hear His audible voice, but He speaks to me.

I was reminded of this in a movie theater one afternoon several years ago. It was a movie I really wanted to see despite the R rating. I'm a big girl, after all, and can filter out the bad stuff. Besides, my favorite actors were in it. No one else was available to go - so I went by myself.

It was an early afternoon showing, and I literally had the little theater almost to myself. I was surrounded by a sea of empty chairs. I relaxed into my seat as the the lights dimmed and the movie began. It was a good movie. It really was. However the language was really rough. I became increasingly uncomfortable. I looked at the empty seat next to me and imagined Jesus sitting there. After all, He goes everywhere I take Him. He resides in my heart. So there He was, and I felt such sadness sweep over me.

I made a decision that afternoon, to never go anywhere or listen to anything I didn't think Jesus would be comfortable with. I confess, I have messed up a couple of times, but for the most part this knowing He is always with me has shaped my choices.

I don't say this is right for everyone, but for me it is exactly right. My imagination and sensitivity is such that I don't do well storing up certain things in my heart. There are some things there I wish I had never seen or heard.  He knows what is best for me. I think He showed up that afternoon to gently get that point across.

Immanuel - God with us.

Blessings,
Linda

With Us - Day 25

I'm very late today. It has been a full day with little time to write.

We voted.

I picked up my new glasses - progressive lenses! I finally had to admit I can't see very well - not to read, not to work on the computer and not to see long distance. So....I am walking around as though the ground beneath my feet has suddenly turned to water, trying very hard not to get sea sick. Also, it feels as though someone is pulling at my eyeballs. They say it takes time to get used to them. sigh.....growing old is not for the faint of heart.

Then we met friends for lunch. Good food and great conversation, sprinkled liberally with laughter. We all came back here to our house to continue the talk.

It was a good day. And He was with us - every single moment:

     - as we voted with hearts turned toward Him; I felt the privilege deeply today
     - as I slipped on new glasses - everything came into sharp focus, and I thought about seeing things      through His eyes
     - as we gave thanks for the abundant provision of our daily lives
     - as we shared our faith with one who is still seeking
     - praying throughout the day for the deep, deep needs of dear friends

This is what it is to be in His presence. He is with us - even in the ordinary. There is never a moment He is not near. We are so blessed.

Blessings,
Linda

In the Valley - Day 24

I like it on the mountain top. I like the feel of sunshine on my face, the clear, fresh breeze, the amazing vistas spreading out below me. From my point of view, the limited earthbound one, it would be wonderful to live there. No worries, no cares - just sunshine and puffy white clouds. Wouldn't it be easy to feel the presence of God all the time?

The truth is, it is far more likely I will find Him in the valley. When dark clouds hang heavy, obscuring the sun, and I am surrounded by mountains of suffering and fear I run to Him. It happens in my life over and over again. Those seasons of despair, in the hands of a loving Father, do a deep work in my heart. I find in Him all I need. I find His promises are true. I draw closer to Him.

"But without a valley
How would I ever know
That His strong and gentle hand
Would never let me go
How would I know for sure
That I'm secure and safe wherever I go
Without a valley
How would I know"
Rodney Griffin

Blessings,
Linda

We Will Remember - Day 23

A look back, in remembrance, through the words of Tommy Walker:

We will remember, we will remember
We will remember the works of Your hands.
We will stop and give You praise
For great is Thy faithfulness.

You're our creator, our life sustainer
Deliverer, our comfort, our joy.
Throughout the ages, You've been our shelter
Our peace in the midst of the storm.

With signs and wonders, You've shown your power
With precious blood, You showed us Your grace.
You've been our helper, our liberator
The giver of life with no end.

When we walk through life's darkest valleys
We will look back at all You have done
And we will shout, our God is good
And He is the faithful One.

I still remember the day You saved me
The day I heard You call out my name
You said You loved me and would never leave me
And I've never been the same.



Blessings,
Linda